From an e-mail written by Moose to the men in his ManKind Project group a few days after one of their weekly meetings.
The best way to defeat an enemy is to keep them fighting among themselves: divide and conquer. For millennia this technique has been practiced on enemies of all sorts, but i want to introduce you men and friends of mine to a theory I’ve come up with to explain the so-called battle of the sexes.
And it goes like this:
We’ve divided ourselves against each other.
A marriage is the closest thing to a tribe we have left. But if men and women are raised to be against each other then you truly do have (as God has been called) a spy in every bedroom.
Ever since the Renaissance and the great sanctification of the Individual that it ushered in, we have become a society of lonely, isolated selves crowded by other lonely, isolated selves. Luckily, hope lies in a new style of intimate, trusting relationship between men and women.
I say we drop the battle of the sexes and stop blaming “them.” It could ironically be the single best piece of work we could do to bond as a group of concerned men. We can stand together in full acceptance that there is nothing we can do to make women change, but much we can give them that they desperately desire by changing ourselves.
As we struggle to accept and see each other as men and do our work as the modern individuals that we’ve been programmed to be, we can literally cut the isolation of our modern world in half:
I say we call a truce. I say we take radical responsibility for OUR half of the divide. I say we start figuring out how to get what we want from — and give what is most truly, most deeply desired to — the women with whom we interact, be they mother, sister, daughter, or lover.
Let’s start assuming that the women in our lives are there because they love us. I say we start assuming — based on this love — that they are ready to understand and receive love from us men… just as soon as we figure out how to effectively give it. You guys are ready and you always have been. I accept that if i have not communicated with you effectively, not shared my ideas appropriately, not made myself visible to you such that i feel understood, heard, and seen, then obviously MY communication is where to start looking for the problem, and not with you.
Thank you, and
Sir Moose Esq. Ph.D. ADHD.
Where do you stand in the battle?